A vote for shorter people

March 22, 2004 at 7:20 pm (General)

Like Descartes fingering a piece of wax, I struck on a brilliant theory. I would go so far as calling it a law. Coming back from Mont St-Hilaire yesterday, we were driving by all the apple tree groves. The milliner pointed out how creepy they all looked, and I mentioned that they were pruned. This way, by staying short, they expend more energy to bearing fruit, and therefore don’t waste it all on growing.
And then, eureka! It struck me! Short people have way more energy to spend on, say, sex, than they do for being tall. It’s so simple! Occam’s razor. So, to everyone out there over 5’8″ (1.75m)? You’re terrible in bed compared to us more-earthly bound folks. Hey, the truth hurts. I guess you could always play basketball.
The same theory, I guess, could apply to anyone over, um, 30. You’ve stopped growing, time to knock boots properly.

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