Don’t know how I’m going to break this to the milliner, but I think it’s over for her and I. What can I say, now that Halle is officially single, all those cards and emails I’ve sent to her, detailing our future together, along with our mutual suicide pact, will finally come to fruition.
Oh, sure, she claims to have to no knowledge of me, but I think this was simply a ploy to detract the paparazzi. Why do you think my raspBerry came to town last year? It definitely wasn’t to make a movie.
Come, Halle, join me, and we shall indulge in our favourite pastime of drunk-driving.